One Year Later

I can hardly believe that it has been a year since my miscarriage. For those of you who don't know, last year I had a miscarriage the night before Mothers Day. Yeah, it wasn't the best Mothers Day for me. Of course that was just the beginning of the ordeal I went through...


After I miscarried I called the doctor's office and they diagnosed it as a complete miscarriage. But that next week I still felt pregnant and went into the doctors office and tested positive for pregnancy. I was told that I shouldn't have tested positive for pregnancy a week after a miscarriage so they did an ultrasound, and yes they saw something in there, but no heartbeat. Imagine the emotional trauma: you think your baby is gone, just to find out you are still pregnant, just to find out there is no heartbeat. The diagnosis: it was probably twins and the second one died after I lost the first. They couldn't tell me for sure if it was twins because I didn't save the tissue I passed so they couldn't test it, but that is what appeared to have happened. Anyways, they said it might still be too early to see a heartbeat so I had to undergo quantitative HCG tests for the next week and a half. After that was all over, the result: it was growing but not at a significant rate which meant it wasn't a viable embryo. The doctor told me that I would have to undergo Metheltrexate(sp?) treatments to help me finish the miscarriage. What the treatment is, is a cancer drug they give you to help you finish up a miscarriage. During this whole time I had been experiencing bleeding. I felt like a horrible person if I underwent the treatments, but the doctor looked me right in the eye and said that the only other alternative was that I could bleed to death. So I was sent immediately to the hospital for my first treatment. It made me so sick. The first treatment wasn't effective enough so I had to undergo a second. When it was all done, I was still having uncontrolled bleeding. So I was put on birth control for two months and then told that we could try again. Well, we did and got pregnant right away, much to our surprise. And now we are just waiting for this new little guy to join our family...we've waited a long time for him, so I suppose a few more weeks doesn't seem too long.